Depression
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Pill of Tears
“If I could catch my tears…Put them in a pill for you to take…Maybe then you would understand.” I pulled out an old sketchbook / notebook from the early 2000s. There are only a few pages used. The last page with something on it has this sketch. Back when I was struggling with depression, anxiety,…
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Emptiness
Build my life upon these dreams Comforts and cozies fill my thoughts Returning to a place familiar and warm Memories of achievement and joy Love, yes love felt and expressed The lie roles off my tongue like marbles on hill Expressed yes, but not love Comforts are facades hiding what lies behind Dreams are more…
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I have to post this. I don’t like to talk about my weaknesses. Who does really? It has taken years to deal with and even understand why I am the way I am. I still don’t have all the answers. But I do understand my battle with depression more now than I ever did. It…
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The Well
the well so deep, yesterday not so much today your love your friendship my guide my strength to fill the pit beneath me light is like words encouraging yet thin but your hand it breaks the stone it clears the path these wells that form deep under foot bored out by our own hands when…
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Ambient in the Dark
A warm glow fills the room with ambient life. It dances it’s colorful song in abundance just outside my window. I peer into the light. My restless limbs heavy as I turn. My dreams all but faded into the subconscious. The light beckons as it burns. The sound of my heart broken by a passing…
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No Ice Cream
Alone in a room Sitting Sitting Sitting Slow Down, the melancholy of Radiohead Wholefoods, Mac-n-cheese offending my wallet Joyous, my tongue tastes organic cheeses melted Eyes dead set in a window Rain Falling Falling Falling Cold in a well heated room Bustling city, this inclement day has your attentions Holiday of me A self imposed…
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Running in Shadows
Some wounds run too deep. The sounds of cracking bones or the words of petty fools. I cannot see the scars. Time has washed them clear. I cannot feel the shot. The bullets have long since been removed. When all I ever wanted was to run away. I ran. Far away. Deep in the forests…
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Changing it all…
I have spent my life changing. Trying to change. Trying to improve myself. Working towards a better me. There was a time in my life I did not care. That is no longer me. I admit I am far from perfect. I procrastinate like a pro. I fall back into self destructive patterns as fast…
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The Battle Rages On.
For those of you who know me, I have been through some wicked radical changes in the past couple of years. The specifics of change are only marginally important most of the time. Sometimes not. I am a woman of change. I have seen and done things most people cannot imagine. But I am still…